butterflies

butterflies2

art
introduced us
you dug my poetry
i loved your smile
how it disappeared
and you followed
spirit
emerged
leading listeners
through thresholds
of other lives
to ancestors
as you drummed

we discussed
energy
source
how we are
slaves
to its force
writer
poet
singer
drummer
dancer.
somehow i came
to beg you
identify
as just one
you answered
what religion is god

activist
owner
hustler
cultivated
by struggle
insisting
everything fair
isn’t equal
willing to die
for your people
conflicted
between
their wants and needs
greed
you concede
capitalist
sweet talk them
into buying
anti-consumerism
hypocrisy

lean, brown, tall
muscular build
sharp jawline
you were masculine
before
even in a dress
now in acceptance
you are something else

joining hands
interlacing fingers
my palm
kisses yours
as i
mentally speak affirmations
to get anchored
in my own greatness
that i do not worship you
or feel honored
to have your attention.
that i am present
not worrying
about your intentions
or contemplating
how
to make you stay.

Advertisements

Pruning Poems

pruning poems

I am reading a book on how to write poetry. I’ve already written thousands of poems, but I like experimenting with language. More importantly I’m always seeking ways to grow as a writer.  Because I am a performing poet, I usually write longer poems with rhyme and rhythm.

In my current research there is a beauty in simplicity introduced.  That fact, offers opportunities to succinctly express my thoughts.

As soon as I woke up this morning, I read and did writing exercises.  I’ve already written two concise poems today.  Which meant a lot of edits, but it was fun. I love reading something several times until it feels right.

 

How Do You Publish An Ebook On CreateSpace 7/11/14

Went to bed early, so I woke up before sunrise. It’s quiet in the morning. The silence doesn’t leave any opportunity to waste the day. So I decided to publish a project myself and another writer have been working on.

Neither of us have ever published through CreateSpace.  I offered to do the publishing because I’ve always wanted to see how CreateSpace works.  I began this project by looking for stock photos to make the cover. I was trying to create a cover collage when I read it would be easier to make the cover on the site where you are publishing the book.  So I started the publishing process.  I really wanted to just finish the cover while I was in the mood, but there were tons of questions.

We decided, because it’s a short story and not a novel that we would only offer this project as an ebook.  However, I didn’t see where you could just publish an ebook.  In fact, I didn’t even see an option for ebook.  The only option for publishing was paperback. With that being said, Amazon assigns an ISBN for the paper back. Since I didn’t see the option for an ebook and know you must have a different ISBN for the ebook I’m completely lost. How are you guys publishing ebooks on Amazon?

All help is greatly appreciated.

Love and Light

BEAUTIFUL NEWS: Spelman College Raises A Whopping $157.8 Million

Go Spelman!!!

HelloBeautiful

[ione_embed src=//www.youtube.com/embed/FppQIW_X9Bc service=youtube width=853 height=480 type=iframe]

The board of trustees at Spelman College launched a major comprehensive fundraising campaign in 2009, with the slogan, “Every Woman Every Year,” and they set a goal to raise $150 million dollars. Thanks to the hard work of many and the generous support of donors, they have not only achieved the massive goal, but they have surpassed it, raising an impressive $157.8 million! President of Spelman College, Dr. Beverly Daniel Tatum and Board of Trustees Chair, Rosalind Gates Brewer made the monumental announcement above.

Must Read: BEAUTIFUL NEWS: Spelman Co-Valedictorian Twins Write Self-Help Book

This campaign has allowed the Spelman board to fund new faculty positions, renew the campus with the renovation of Laura Spelman Rockefeller Hall and helped with the construction of Reed Hall–home of wellness revolution. They have also expanded their technology and raised $50 million towards scholarship support! This more than…

View original post 185 more words

Here and Now 7/7/2014

Today ended better than I anticipated. I started this day feeling unprepared and annoyed with myself I hadn’t completed more tasks off the imaginary list I’ve assigned, myself. LOL!

I’m grateful I’ve arrived at a place in my life where I question the truths I tell myself. I am grateful that I have given myself permission to be present; feeling, being, loving, laughing and not trying to be perfect. I am grateful to be processing. I am grateful to be feeling connected. Connection is now.

Feeling disconnected comes from resistance to WHERE I AM. For me, resistance is doing anything begrudgingly and not feeling the gratification that comes from simply becoming, creating and achieving. For me resistance is holding my breath until some future moment. Except, you never actually get to the moment where you get to be because you are always doing, changing, creating, achieving… moving. Resistance is not seeing or feeling the joy or lesson in our actions.

I am grateful that I am loving me right now while making the best choices and taking the best actions for future me… And I’m not holding my breath until I’m skinnier, richer, more educated or whatever… Now I get what it means to enjoy the journey and not to do things for the end result. I’m learning to choose work where I welcome challenges and look forward to how it will enrich my life.

I am grateful I won’t be holding my breath until some better day, because today is the best day. Here and now, I am enough and anything else is extra. I am grateful for this moment of clarity. I am grateful for this day. I am grateful for all the lessons that taught and prepared me to be- here. Love, Love, Love

Poetry or Fiction 7/4/2014

I keep showing up to the blank page with so much inspiration and energy spread in too many directions to harness one thought long enough to breathe life into it. So much on my mind. There is a poetry book of new poems brewing. Where and how will I publish it seems to be the most pressing questions, when I lie to myself. “What will I write?” Is the question when I’m wallowing in the truth.

I keep going back and forth between whether I should finish, Daughter of Zion (DOZ), the novel I promised to have published and available in September. I’m not even done writing the first draft of DOZ.

Tonight, I am realizing how much truth goes into fiction. I am on a quest for love. My main character is on a quest for love. I know that love is inside of us, but is it felt there without any outside stimulation or affirmations? I’m wondering if love isn’t like a seed, planted in our spirits that must be watered, pruned and warmed by light.

Something keeps saying, “Finish the poetry book first.” It is a collection of poems about love, not a collection of love poems.

Tonight I realized, I needed to finish my meditation on love before I could explore it in fiction.  And that’s why I needed to finish the poetry book.  Then again, I’m concerned… Is all of this just talk to make me feel a false sense of progression while I’m becoming stagnant and self sabotaging.  I don’t know that I will ever stop meditating on love, or reach any conclusions that won’t bend or break under the weight of time and experience.  If I never stop meditating on love how will I ever finish my poetry book about love?  The poetry book, I hear, I must finish first.

I am grateful for this clarity, that I must finish the poetry book, first.
I am also feeling a lot of guilt resistance about focusing solely on the poetry book.   That means I will have to stop reading books from and about my time period.  It means I have to stop researching all these amazing women, artists and events.  It means I will have to stop meditating on pictures and songs I find online.  I’m enjoying the research.  I feel like I’ve made some new friends and had an entire other life in Harlem.

I guess now, my poems will be more focused.  Maybe I will hear my spirit clearer.  Instead of piecing together thoughts that may not be true to the path I’m actually taking to clarity on love.

What will I do now, when I’m moved to write in my novel?  When I see my main character standing in a room, speaking or behaving in a way that is revealing some eternal truth that moves me to tears or laughter, will I ignore her?  Anytime I feel it I need to write it down.

Why does she always shows up when I’m moving through the rituals required to live; while making breakfast, packing lunch and cooking dinner for more lunches. My main character gets at the core of her issues when I’m on the way to work or in the shower. I don’t have time to even write scenes on notecards. If I surrender every time she reveals herself, I might be anchored in enlightened and completely absent from my life…

Pushing on. Let me stop dwelling.  I’m going to keep a list of books relative to the period I’m researching.  Just like meditation, I won’t fight resistance, I’m going to become it, examine it and release it.  THAT’S SOME BULLSHIT!!! Who taught me this? I’m not becoming resistance, I’m going to let it be and see if there is any value in it.  Sometimes resistance is a warning.  Sometimes resistance is fear.  I won’t be afraid of resistance nor will I surrender to it? Did I really just say I’m going to resist resistance? I’m like the queen of damn riddles tonight.

Tomorrow, I will return all the books I got for research on DOZ.  I don’t even care that the Library is closed.  Tomorrow I will find a few moments to sit with my feelings on love.  Hopefully after a few days of committing to one project, my spirit will be clear enough to show me where we are standing and share the journey in words.

 

I am praying I stop feeling like I’ve abandoned my child.  I pray I stop worrying my main character will disappear, my plot will dissolve and I won’t remember all those moments she moved me in.  I pray that when I return to DOZ, with my poetry book done, I have more clarity and truth to tell the rest of Linny’s story.  Or, I shouldn’t say “the rest” as if I control the ending.  So when I return I can shed light on what parts she wants to share.

Love, Light and Peace

Inspired

I feel like writing, but I don’t feel like I know enough about the subject.  I’m reading a book about the Great Migration, so that I can build strong less prominent characters.  Writing historical fiction, I’ve learned you never know what’s going to be important until it’s important.

My friend Claudia says even when you aren’t writing your mind is filling in the holes.  I agree. The story is constantly deepening.